Happy Monday Pumpkin Pals!

Don’t mind the hay on the floor—we’re postin’ up at our field base this week, broadcastin’ live from the heart of the fall market trail. This here’s the Punkin’ Patch Dispatch, your unofficial, underfunded, and over-caffeinated cryptid intel report — written entirely with authentic chilly fingers and cider breath.

This week’s got everything under the full moon: Zombies spotted in Red Bank, Folktales from my Pappaw, Glowin’ eyeballs in Chickamauga, and me standin’ ten toes down in the middle of it all, holdin’ a cinnamon pretzel and shoutin’ into the wind like a victorian’ child who just discovered coffee beans.

So grab your scarf, zip up that hoodie, and let’s get into it. October’s just gettin’ started!

Today's Issue Includes:

• This week’s Front Porch Partner: Haus

• Chattanooga's Upcoming Events

• This week’s Community Spotlight: The Zombie 5K Fun Run & Market!

• Bubby’s Backwoods Beasts Entry #1: The Possadillo of Waverly

• Clementine’s Corner: The Life of a Chattynooga Girl (October Version)

• Wrap Up

Care for some tunes while ya read? Just flick the radio switch right over here and get to vibin’! We even gotta new radio for the occassion!

Together with

This week’s Front Porch Partner: Haus

Y’ALL. We did it. Thanks to your clicks, shares, and sweet-as-peach-pie donations, we officially hit our $500 fundraising goal for Hope on the Porch this September! Whether you dropped a few dollaroonies in the pot, clicked on these Front Porch Partnership ads, or just sent us good vibes from yer inbox — you were part of it, and we’re mighty grateful for yer support. We’ll be sure to share a final update of our donation later in the month once it hits our piggy bank.

Now we’re movin’ into October with our very first in-person market booth (details below, you’re gonna love it!) and this month’s Front Porch Partnership is helpin’ us hit the ground runnin’.

Your support goes toward:

• Waters for our 5K runners (hydrated ghouls = happy ghouls)

• Booth setup, stickers, and supplies

• And gettin’ Chattynooga out into the real world to spread joy in our local communities.

Just clickin’ the ad helps us out. No signin’ up or nothin’! Thanks for keepin’ this porch light burnin’. Haus — take ‘er away!

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What’s Goin’ On in the Scenic City?

Community

• Ghouls Night Out
  Thursday, 10/9 @ The Greenhouse | 4:00–9:00PM
  Embrace spooky season with an evening of frightful fun at The Greenhouse. Enjoy a featured cocktail, make your own charms and ghost candles, and shop the Fairly Moody pop-up while the ghouls come out to play.

  🍸Frights, fashion, and fancy drinks

• Murder Mystery Crime Night
  Thursday, 10/9 @ Hoptown Southside | 6:30–8:30PM
  Join Girl Chat for an all-new murder mystery night made just for the girls. Channel your inner detective, follow the clues, and uncover the culprit in this night of suspense, laughter, and perfectly plotted drama.
  🔪 A killer night out

• Halloween at the Chattanooga Free Store
  Sunday, 10/12 @ Chattanooga Free Store | 3:00–5:00PM
  Skip the costume shop and find your Halloween look for free at the Chattanooga Free Store. Build your perfect spooky-season outfit without spending a dime. No tricks, just treats.
  🎃 Boo on a budget

Music & Entertainment

• Art and Music on the Bluff
  Wednesday, 10/8 @ Houston “Pop-Up” Museum & Bocce Court Terrace | 7:00–10:00PM
  Spend an evening under the lights with the Chattanooga Symphony and the Houston Museum of Decorative Arts for their annual Art and Music on the Bluff. Enjoy live music, local art, and a serene riverside view perfect for a midweek escape.
  🌙 A symphony under the stars 

• Rocky Horror Picture Show Live
  Friday, 10/10 & Saturday, 10/11 @ Chattanooga Theatre Centre | 8:00PM
  Do the Time Warp again with Kaleidoscope Entertainment’s live production of The Rocky Horror Picture Show, celebrating 50 years of cult-classic chaos. Lace up your corset, grab your toast, and get ready for a night of wild, weird fun.
  👄 Antici…pation guaranteed

• Kids’ Costume & Book Swap
  Sunday, 10/12 @ Full Circle Refillery | 12:00–3:00PM
  Swap, don’t shop! Bring a gently used book or costume and trade for something new-to-you at Full Circle Refillery’s first-ever sustainable Halloween swap. It’s a fun, family-friendly way to celebrate spooky season and stay green.
  👻 Swap it like it’s haunted

Outdoors ‘n’ Stuff

• Fall Forward Festival 2025
  Saturday, 10/11 @ Death Farm, Chickamauga, GA | 10:00AM–4:00PM
  Join the Chattanooga Food Forest Coalition, Alter Eco Farms, Reconnect Nature School, and Death Farm Permaculture for the first-ever Fall Forward Festival. Enjoy a day of music, vendors, workshops, and connection with the land and local community.
  🌾 Growing something good together

• Highland Park Porchfest 2025
  Saturday, 10/11 @ Highland Park | All day starting at 10:30AM
  Highland Park’s porches turn into stages for a full day of neighborhood music, art, and community. This year, Porchfest is partnering with Be the Change Youth Initiative for a canned food drive supporting the CGLA food pantry. Drop donations at any porch and help your favorite hosts collect the most!
  🏡 Chattanooga’s coziest block party

• Twilight Harvest Moon Market
  Saturday, 10/11 @ Chattanooga Choo Choo | 5:00–10:00PM
  Celebrate the season under the Harvest Moon with live music, pumpkin-themed treats, and autumn crafts at the Twilight Harvest Moon Market. Meet local author Celeste Baxendell, sip craft brews, and maybe even go on a blind date with a book.
  🌕 A market made for moonlight

Got somethin’ cookin’ that the Scenic City oughta know about? Wanna talk about how cool your weekend was? Tell us all about it! We’d love to yap it up and holler all about it from the porch! Just reply to this message, or send a separate one to [email protected]!

This week’s Community Spotlight: The Zombie 5K Fun Run & Market!

BREAKIN’ NEWS (and possibly bones): We’re leavin’ the porch, y’all! 

For the first time ever, Chattynooga will be set up LIVE and in person at a real-deal event, and we couldn’t be more jazzed (or slightly terrified).

Join us Saturday, October 11 at the Zombie 5K Fun Run & Market in Red Bank! Put on by our awesome pals at Walnut Street Publishing, We’ll be vendin’ right alongside the undead with a fresh batch of stickers, fall-flavored doodads, and some extra-special surprises we’ll have (hopefully) conjured up just for this shindig. If you ever wanted to see Clem an’ I hollerin’ about happenins and things goin’ on in Chattanooga while dodgin’ zombies then this is your moment.

So whether you’re runnin’, shamblin’, or just showin’ up for the spooky vibes, come visit the Pumpkin Patch Dispatch booth and say howdy! We’ll be smilin’ so big you’d think we already made it to the afterparty.

The Deets inna Nutshell

• 🎪 Market + Fest kicks off at 3:00 PM

• 🧟‍♀️ Run begins at 5:30 PM

• 🎉 Afterparty at Clever Alehouse ‘til 10:00 PM

Sound like a ghoulishly fun time to ya? We thought so too! Hop on in for more details, and to purchase tickets if ya wanna be a runner below!

Bubby’s Backwoods Beasts Entry #1: The Possadillo of Waverly, Tennessee

Now I ain’t tryin’ to cause a stir like we did talkin’ bout’ the Alabama Leprechaun, but I gotta tell y’all about the time my Pappaw saw a Possadillo. Yep. A real one. Middle of the night, just sittin’ there like it owned the yard. Little fella blinked twice, rolled into a ball, then hissed politely and waddled off like nothin’ happened.

Pappaw says it all started back in the 1980s, way out near Waverly, Tennessee. A few lonely armadillos got lost tryin’ to find the Grand Ole Opry (that part’s unconfirmed), and ended up wanderin’ into a possum den out behind an old barn. Them possums was mighty hospitable — offered ‘em some blackberries, maybe a sip of creekwater, one thing led to another and…

Boom. Baby Possadillo.

Now the Possadillo ain’t yer average backyard critter. It’s gotta possum’s grabby little hands, an armadillo’s armor-plated booty, and the attitude of a grandma who just found out the biscuits got burnt. It’s cute, but in that way where yer not sure if it’s gonna snuggle you or steal your food right outta the trash can.

Pappaw says they’re mischievous but kind. Like, they’ll sneak into your pantry, rearrange your canned goods into alphabetical order, then leave a note that says “NEED MOOR GREEN BEANZ IN DIET KATIE-BETH”.

Some folks say they’re mythical. Others say they’re just possums with emotional baggage. I say they’re misunderstood heroes. If you wanna go cryptid crawlin’ yourself, go ‘head and get your boots on, bring your flashlight, and keep a lookout. If you see somethin’ small, round, and too adorable to be trusted, tell it Bubby says hi.

And y’know what else? If you believe in the Possadillo (and you should now that I told ya ‘bout em), then you oughta mark your calendar for the Green Eyes Festival comin’ up in Chickamauga on October 18. It’s a whole day of stories, spooks, and Appalachian oddities, includin’ but not limited to:

• One (1) ghost with spooky laser eyes

• Several booths fulla folks who believe in cryptids and critters to yap with

• Maybe even a Sasquatch sighting (BIG MAYBE ON THIS ONE)

Anyway, just thought I’d share some of the fun folktales about critters that Pappaw’s tole me about durin’ his years. Should I ask him to tell me some more stories to share with ya durin’ spooky season?

Clementine’s Corner: The Life of a Chattynooga Girl (October Version)

I don’t know if y’all have noticed, but October has rolled in like a chilly pumpkin spice fog over the mountains and I am HERE FOR IT. Anne of Green Gables says she’s glad she lives in a world where there are Octobers and I am inclined to agree with her. October in Chattanooga sure is something special, too, so this week I wanna tell you some of the things I’m most excited for this month so you can get excited right along with me!

1. Find the house with the Halloween decorations: You know the one. Every neighborhood’s got it. I’m talking a twelve-foot skeleton in a pirate hat, orange and purple lights tangled in the trees, and a spiderweb so big it has its own zip code. You know, for a holiday about the dead, Chattanooga sure comes to life at Halloween.

2. Watch the sunset at Sunset Rock: I mean, come on, it’s right there in the name! I’ll lace up my hiking boots (and Bubby’s, if he’ll let me) and drag him up the trail. From the top of Lookout Mountain, the whole city looks like it’s glowing just for us.

3. Watch leaves fall in the park with The Life of a Showgirl on repeat: Listen, I’m pretty sure Taylor made this album just so I could enjoy it all October long. Maybe I’ll even pull out a red scarf and make Bubby film a dramatic music video with Pickle as my background dancer. That’s the life of a Chattynooga showgirl, babe.

4. GO PICK EVERYTHING: Apples at Wheeler’s Orchard. Pumpkins at Flat Top Mountain Farm. Flowers at Creekside Flower Farm. I might even pick a new corner of Chattanooga to fall in love with. The picking possibilities are endless!

5. Build a bonfire and trade ghost stories with friends: I know a great one about a sneaky lil gnome who wandered out of Rock City… and NEVER CAME BACK. Bubby will make s’mores and I’ll catch my marshmallows on fire. Just know if I start hearing twigs snapping, I’m blaming the gnome.

If you ask me, October is basically just a storybook love letter to fall, and Chattanooga is the page it’s written on (with little pumpkins and stars doodled in the margins). You can find me somewhere between a corn maze and haunted hayride this month. I’ll save you a s’more!

Thanks fer sittin’ a spell and catchin’ up!

Just like that, the cider’s gone cold, and this issue’s reachin’ the bottom of the basket. Thanks for hangin’ out with us for another wild porch adventure. I reckon we’ll be diggin’ leaves out of our socks ‘til November.

We’ve got more cozy chaos comin’ soon, so keep that porch light on and your inbox open. And hey, if you spot somethin’ with green eyes starin’ back at you in the woods… just wave politely and offer ‘em a MoonPie.

See ya next week with more fall shenanigans!

— Bubby & Clementine